Perpetual Middle Schoolers
A note from a friend:
My daughter and I are going to small claims court. Her builder has been very uncooperative! We will see what a judge has to say about it!
When, exactly, did my friend get old enough to have a daughter old enough to have a builder?!!? In my mind, his kids are perpetual middle schoolers–forever young, forever unwed, forever innocent of the serious cares of life. Sigh.
My dad told me that pace life appears to accelerate as he ages. 2010? What happened to 2001?
I met with another friend for lunch back in October. I described some plans that I have for a ministry to students. He listened carefully, nodded a few times, then asked me to remind him of my age.
You don’t have much time then!
Ouch. Time for me to find a few dishonest friends.
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Tags: age, daughters, friends, lunch, speed, years
Triangles at Christmas
I spent many “White Christmases” in my years living at a more northern latitude. I especially enjoyed being outside during a snowfall. The eerie quiet that fell along with the snow always made me especially aware of every little nuance of the scene. I used to try to catch the flakes on something dark–like the sleeve of my jacket–so that I could inspect individual snowflakes. Their regular hexagonal patterns with seemingly infinite variation amazed me. It was magical.
Now researchers at Caltech have ruined it for me. They have discovered–and can elaborately explain–how *some* snowflakes are triangular. (Did I hear somebody say, “Briangular?) It has something to do with the way a regular hex-shaped flake gets bent back by the air as it falls. Huh?
I’ll never be able to enjoy a snowfall the same way again…
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Tags: hexagon, quiet, snow, snowflake, triangle
Blind Luck?
“Aren’t you offended when someone says, ‘I am so blessed?!!?’”
The speaker was upset because, in her mind, the latter statement demonstrated arrogance and superiority. “I mean, God lets some children starve. Does that mean he loves the rich more?!!? I should hope not!”
The answer depends on your world view.
If you believe in luck–a.k.a. blind chance–to say, “I am blessed,” because you were born into relative affluence is an acknowledgment that you had nothing to do with it. It wasn’t by your own power or initiative that you were born then and there. The only way one could find this offensive, in my opinion, is if one was really upset that credit for the situation could be given to God.
If your world view includes a belief in God, then “luck” can’t be part of the equation. If there is a creator, is it really plausible that he’s playing dice with the universe? Does it really make sense that he’d just let things happen by random chance? I don’t think so. Therefore, “I am blessed,” is a very humble acknowledgment that, “I didn’t earn this.”
It seems to me, then, that the only way to consider such a statement offensive is to have a firmly held anti-God stance–so firm that you don’t want him getting any credit.
No one knows why God gives material or health blessings to some and not to others. If someone claims that they understand that, they are either wrong or lying. What’s clear in the Bible is that God does not favor the rich over the poor. In fact, in most cases where God rails against nations it’s because the nations have failed to care for the poor and the needy, the widow and the orphan, in their midst. God cares very much about the plight of the poor, and he seems to expect those of us who aren’t to lend a hand.
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Tags: God, luck, orphans, poor, religion, widows
Advanced Communicator Silver!
This week I delivered my 30th regular speech at my local Toastmasters club meeting. That achievement, coupled with a couple of other presentations, has earned for me another Toastmasters award: Advanced Communicator Silver.
I’m excited! I thoroughly enjoy Toastmasters. I encourage you to check them out:
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Tags: advanced communicator, public speaking, silver, Toastmasters
Wasted Days and Wasted Nights
The truth is, it was kind of meaningless. I feel I wasted something.
The October 2, 2009 edition of The Week magazine reports that this is actor Woody Harrelson’s assessment of years of “hedonism” brought on by quick success in a business known for its excesses. Harrelson continues:
…you take those hours–not to mention the money–I spent and apply it toward something meaningful… I could have learned 12 languages! I could’ve learned several martial arts. I mean mastered. I could’ve become a successful engineer and still had time to study acupuncture and the guitar, the flute, and the ukelele. I did have a… ball! Loved it! But did it help me or anyone around me?
The last question shows that Harrelson is finally starting to get it. Our value, our worth, is not measured by how well we entertained, how much money we made, or how many partners we slept with. Our success is measured by the kind of difference we make in the lives of those around us.
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Tags: actor, Harrelson, hedonism, regret, service
Busyness
My wife and I joined a tiny start-up church a little more than a year ago. One of the interesting characteristics of this church is that most of the members are young families with small children. I find myself–for the first time in my life–one of the oldest members of the congregation.
Our kids are grown. We no longer have the challenges of diapers, babysitters, teacher meetings, ball practices, and so on. As I met with a few of the men from the church last night, we prayed over their concerns and frustrations, about their busyness, and about their desires to be great husbands, fathers, and Jesus-followers.
When the praying was done it hit me: I’m busy in a new way. Subtly, unnoticed, I have gradually replaced the busyness of raising small children with the busyness of other things. Blogging, tutoring, serving all take up the time that I once had set aside for my kids.
I have been listening to my first few sermons from a pastor named Matt Chandler. Pastor Chandler is beating into me the concept of Sabbath, the concept of rest, and the concept of being silent. Chandler rightly says that we often fill our lives up with sound and fury so that we don’t have to confront the emptiness of our souls–an emptiness without Jesus Christ.
Seek silence this week. Seek silence this month. Put away the iPod for a while. Turn off the TV. Listen to what God might be saying to you.
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Tags: busyness, children, faith, jesus, meditation, parenting, quiet
Position-Action-Benefit
My Toastmasters colleague, Laura Poole, recently sited something that I use to help in speechcraft. It’s called Position-Action-Benefit, or PAB.
PAB is a pattern that I use for two purposes:
1) As an outline for my open/close of a longer prepared speech
2) As an outline for impromptu speeches of rather short duration
A typical prepared speech would look like this:
- Grabber
- Situation/Complication/Question
- Opening PAB
- Body of speech including 3 main points
- Closing PAB
- Memorable quote or line
The opening PAB is my position, what I want the audience to do during my talk, and the benefit they will get for doing so. The Closing PAB is a repeat of my position, the actions I want them to take after they leave, and the benefits they get from those actions.
Note that the opening position is the answer to the question that came before it.
For example:
How many of you would agree to take a 50% pay cut? (Grabber) The situation is that we have far too many high-school drop outs in NC. (Situation) This is a huge problem because those without high-school diplomas will make, on average, 50% less than their graduating peers. And they often don’t know it! (Complication) In this economy, the question becomes, “How are we going to keep these kids in school?” (Question.) I believe the answer is in building relationships. (Position) What I’d like you to do is take a journey with me into the lives of the young people around us. (Action–code for “listen to me!” Ha!) By the time we’re through, I think you’ll see that just a few hours of your time can make a huge difference in a young life. (Benefit)
Then, at the end, the PAB would be:
I believe that the answer is in building relationships. (position) As you leave here today I’d like you to take a flier with you. After you get home, I’d like to invite you to search your heart for the ways you’d like to help address this terrible problem our children are facing. (action) A few hours of your time can change a life forever. (benefit)
The impromptu (or elevator speech) benefit of PAB is that now I’m ready to talk about my topic in a pointed way given just the briefest period of time. Let’s say the previous speaker goes over time, my plane is late, or a reporter calls me on the phone. I can use the closing PAB plus a bit of flourish to make my point, call for action, and probably get invited back to speak at length.
Win!
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Tags: elevator speech, impromptu, organization, pattern, Toastmasters
Tetris!
A newsflash for Tetris lovers everywhere! Scientists studying the human brain have discovered that playing the shape-stacking game actually increases the number of cells in your brain, and it makes your brain use more efficient cells!
Neurologist Richard Haier performed the research in which brain scans of participants were taken before and after weeks of daily Tetris practice. The second scans showed thickening of brain tissues in some areas and more efficient use of tissues in other areas. Haier and his colleagues have yet to figure out exactly what this means–such as do these physical changes in the brain mean improvement in performance of other tasks than playing the game.
In the mean time, go play Tetris!
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Tags: brain, games, research, Tetris
In the Moment
I tried to be calm as I walked down the street, blood dripping from my hands. The damage to the skin on my right palm was the most severe, so I held it up in front of me, using my left hand to apply pressure to stop the bleeding. 3 of the knuckles on my left hand and my right elbow were bleeding, too. I was a mess. A few of the drivers that went by gave me a second look, but most hurried on down the road. I expected more of a reaction.
By the time I made it back to the office, the blood had congealed between my hands. They were stuck together. The security guard behind the front lobby desk took one look at me and called for the Emergency Response Team. 20 people rushed to the lobby, one of them carrying the automated defibrillator. Oh, my.
I tried to explain to them that I was fine. I’d been out for a run, tripped, and surrendered a bunch of skin to the asphalt. No broken bones. My head had not hit the ground. I was going to be okay. They washed me down, disinfected the world out of me, and bandaged me up. That was 2 months ago.
I still have obvious scars where the skin hasn’t quite healed. All of this was the result of not being in the moment. I was daydreaming as I ran, thinking about the playoff game my favorite hockey team was in that night. I had been running regularly for more than 23 years. I had run this same course 500 times before. I didn’t see the stone that I tripped on until after I hit the ground.
Being in the moment is important. Not being in the moment can be costly. I was not in the moment when I hit that stone with my foot. I wasn’t thinking about my footing, my speed, and, most importantly, my direction. This is a modern-day parable for you and me. Check your direction regularly. Be in the moment so that you can avoid the rocks that inevitably lay in our paths.
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Tags: first aid, focus, goals, running
Happy Birthday, Roddenberry
On this date in 1921, Gene Roddenberry, Star Trek creator, was born. His influence made a huge difference in the science fiction landscape. When Roddenberry died in 1991, a portion of his cremated remains were launched into orbit–the first person so honored–until they burned up on re-entry into the atmosphere. In life and in death, Roddenberry was a trail blazer.
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Tags: birthday, science fiction, scifi, star trek
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